Here are a few things I have changed that have helped...
I rarely cook anymore. I don't eat much and neither do the boys it seams so I stopped stressing about it. I make a family meal on Sundays which we eat leftovers from multiple times each week. We also have lots of yogurt, string cheese, tuna, eggs, taco salad, pancakes, and more often than not lunch meat with crackers. Fresh fruit is a must. I figure its easy, cheap, and quick. At least its not french fries and hot dogs constantly, right? Its a running joke with my sister and friends that whenever we pack a lunch to go to the zoo or museum I bring tuna salad and crackers. Less dishes for me to hand wash every night too. I bought a big package of paper plates and plastic forks. I will work harder to save the planet when Johnny is home and I have a dishwasher.
Wesley has been fighting me every nap and bed time about putting his head on his pillow and laying down. I finally took the pillow away. Problem solved. He also yells "akid" about everything. I'm assuming he thinks its a naughty word. I have decided not to care and ignore it for now.
We started our chore/star chart again. Bingo. Daniel and Jaxon have both been trying to earn stars the last few days and its like they are different kids. Daniel even helped Jaxon read during scripture reading time last night. Made my heart melt.
We get out of the trailer. We go to the park, pool, museum, science center, every zoo within a two hour drive, restaurant play areas, my parent's house, my sister's house, the beach, etc. Here is my documentation of such places so this post is not so boring...
By the time we leave to come home they are exhausted and I get to have some quiet time.
Last week I might have overdone it with them, but hey after learning to boogie board and eating smores around a beach bonfire they slept until 7:30 Sunday morning which was literally a little piece of heaven on earth. Usually they are up by 6am.
A big change that has also helped is to stop packing. I don't pack my bags to spend the night anywhere. I just throw the bathroom bag in the car on top of my laundry baskets and take off. I wash clothes where ever I can (mostly at my various family member's homes). Most of the pictures I take show my kids in the same clothes all the time but it saves my sanity. I hate coin laundry!!!
I have started to listen to The Garden by Michael McLean regularly. Its a musical allegory of the Garden of Eden when Christ suffered the Atonement. My boys ask questions about it and its nice to explain the Atonement to them based on the music they hear while we drive. They like to listen to the songs Satan (or the snake in the grass as is the character in the musical) is singing. Go figure. Boys! I also read an article by David Bednar in the April Ensign Magazine called The Atonement and the Journey of Mortality. I had met with the Stake President to renew my temple recommend and he counseled me that I was struggling because I needed to let the Atonement work in my life. He was referring to the "strengthening and enabling" power referred to in this talk. For a while I have felt overwhelmed. I have beat myself up thinking that if I had planned better to spread out my kids or not had so many I would be a better mother having more time for each individually. Two of the four were not planned. Maybe we got ourselves into this difficult situation by being foolish, right? I would go to bed overwhelmed, frustrated, angry, and wonder if I had even told my boys how much I love them that day. I believe the Lord knows me and what I am capable of, but I was feeling so abandoned in my struggles. I was forgetting to lay my troubles at His feet and truly believe he would make me capable of meeting the needs of my children. I'm doing better now, far from perfect, but better. I think we are at least moving in the right direction. Baby steps.
If anyone has any other grand ideas I should try please let me know. I obviously need all the help I can get!
2 comments:
I love the picture of Garrett hanging out of the airplane. Sweet little lamb!
You are doing the best you can and that is more than most people! This gig is so very hard and I fail daily and also forget to rely on the Lord. Why do I feel like I can do it all myself? It is not that I deliberately set out to go it alone, I just forget to ask for help. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and experience. It is always a good reminder to humble ourselves and seek out help from our Heavenly Father who wants to give it so badly.
I love The Garden! Such a beautiful piece of work and I love that you are sharing that with your boys and using it as a teaching tool. You are a good example to me.
You are seriously one of my "mommy heros." I look to you for idead on how to be the best mother. Looking at this very post, gives my a list of things I could be doing better. You rock, sister--don't you forget it! I Love ya!
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